


Spare Me Your Tears

by West_Way



Category: The Dark Crystal: Age of Resistance (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Forced Pregnancy, Implied/Referenced Character Death, M/M, Mating Cycles/In Heat, Non-Graphic Rape/Non-Con, One-Sided Attraction, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Pregnancy, Rape Aftermath, Rape Recovery, Rebellion, Slight OOC, but that was obviously a mistake, don't support in real life, skekVar doesn't die, skeksil will go through a lot, skekung isn't a complete asshole
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-11-27
Updated: 2020-09-20
Packaged: 2021-02-26 04:40:31
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 5
Words: 9,870
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21577717
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/West_Way/pseuds/West_Way
Summary: Sometimes it's a mistake to spare someone's life. Especially when they take it upon themself to put life in you afterward. And then, the one being you actually want to make life with can't now. What to do? What to do?
Relationships: skekSil/skekUng (Dark Crystal), skekSil/skekVar (Dark Crystal)
Comments: 40
Kudos: 78





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This is a sensitive topic, and though it is about fictional alien lizard birds, I want to make it clear I do not support the act of rape or anything like it in real life. I hope I do not offend anyone.

SkekVar, the revied and powerful general, stumble to a secluded location far from the battle as he panted what felt like his final breaths. It was laughable to say the least, that a puny gelfling had rendered him to such a degree. How humiliating to be here now, and having been injured by such a creature that was beneath him. Surely, if he survives, he would be scolded and laughed upon by his fellow Skeksis.

A familiar whimper draws his attention as he sees the Chamberlain stalk closer to his weak form. He huffs and snorts, his body language showing nothing but pain and defeat.

"Friend general, there you are," SkekSil spoke, a hint of something slightly sinister in his already untrustworthy tone. Yet, SkekVar begins to ramble, going on about the lack of humor in the art of war and how the gelfing played dirty. While ever so slightly, Skeksil stalked closer, a grin spread across his beak. At the moment, he currently had an internal battle with his better judgment. His dagger, clenched tightly in his palm, began to appear more useless as he grew closer to the weaker comrade. There was a desire, yes, a burning desire to ram that dagger deep into the flesh of the skeksis who had disposed him of his seat. Yet, there was a more pleasurable idea that loomed over him. Say he spare this skeksis, and once again save him from the grips of death due to a gelfing. SkekVar, who is known to be loyal, who hold SkekSil to the highest esteem. And, have it come to a point where the title of the emperor is thrown up, the general would more than likely to help place the label upon the skeksis that helped him the most.

The pleading words came again and again, and seconds passed quickly. SkekSil had only this moment to act; assist or kill.

The chamberlain, despite his overwhelming feeling against it, decides to outstretch his hand and assist the general up. He allowed the heavier of the two to throw his arm over his neck as they stumbled along to their party. 

"General keep pressure on wound. Be sad if friend bled out," SkekVar grunts and nods. He is grateful to the Chamberlain's newfound generosity towards him. Perhaps if all other skeksis turn against him, he can rely on SkekSil to still regard him as one of his own. And yes, he knew that these spur of kindness was meant as a gateway to an eventual favor, the general still regarded the action as SkekSil wanting him alive at least.

* * *

All the skeksis huddled about in a clustered panic surrounding the crystal. Murmurs and yells echoed to and from the walls. Disregarding all the chatter, SkekVar makes his way to the laboratory to see if he can find anything to patch himself up for the time being. Of course, as he walked by he gained a few scolds and looks of disapproval. Shame hits him hard but he presses on and goes forth with his current mission. Afterward, he would be prepared for whatever punishment might come due to his failure.

As for SkekSil, the skeksis was discussing with his fellow lords when something surged through him. The excitement from the reveal of the Garthims had been drowned out by this unwelcomed feeling. But he throws it back as something akin to an adrenaline crash and nothing more.

It was nothing for the rest of the day as he and the others scrambled around and practically barricaded themselves within the castle as they waited for the arrival of more fearsome skeksis to challenge the gelfing uprising. As the sister suns began to slip below the horizon, SkekSil could not ignore this _nothing_ any longer.

He realized it was beyond nothing when a certain slickness dripped down his inner thighs. No! _No!_

The timing was beyond cruel. How had he neglected his own heat cycle!? Ah yes, the hype around the essence has made him absent-minded towards his own bodily functions. A sigh of relief does come from his throat as he notices the lack of phenomenons excreting from his body. The other skeksis are stressed and tired and in need of comfort ( even if they do not wish to admit it) and a skeksis entering heat would ultimately be utilized to relieve said stress. 

So, swiftly, he sneaks the halls of the castle, now empty with the only living being the skeksis themselves and whatever creatures SkekTek kept trapped in those cages of his.

He hopes that someway or somehow there were leftovers of supplements to at least reduce the effects of this dreadful period. As he walks, he feels himself falling more and more victim to his biological annoyance. Another slick trail falls down his thighs, but he squeezes them tight so nothing drips on the floor. 

A thought passes that maybe others are gathered in the lab too, questioning and inspecting the new creation that was to win this war. And chamberlain creates a horrible scenario in his head. He pauses just outside the opening, listening for the possibility of others and while he does hear voices, luckily it is only one. He sighs. 

"Friend scientist," SkekSil began as SkekTek groaned at hearing the other. "Chamberlain request a favor, mmmm yes?" 

"What could you possibly need at an hour such as this SkekSil?" SkekTek growled as he turned away from the other skeksis and rummaged through his plans and flask. Chamberlain whimpered and messed with his claws for a second. He began to feel uncomfortable and hot and sticky. He hated it deeply. 

"I request supplements!!" SkekSil said louder than he wanted. SkekTek inspected him, making his gaze scan the other up and down as a snarl left his beak. 

"I have none..."

"YOU MUST!" SkekSil shouted, grabbing SkekTek by his shoulders with a brutal grip. SkekTek politely removed those grabby claws and once more asserted himself. 

"I. Have. No. Supplements!! As YOU know, there is no time to prepare such things at a dire time as this," The scientist pushed past the chamberlain, ignoring the further whines and begging until the source decided upon himself to leave. SkekSil cursed under his breath as he left, feeling more paranoid as he went further away and towards his quarters. He hated being refused or feeling defeated.

* * *

SkekSil whimpered as he slowly stalked towards his room. The bubbling of his heat was taking over his body and he felt basic functions fail him. His legs felt numb. His clothing damp. Breathing? Uneasy and desperate. He hated how his body felt. He despised feeling like this. It had been many a trine that he had suffered through this dreadful fate and for it to dare happen now was an insult upon himself. 

He slumped against the wall, just a few steps away from his door. Sweat began to pour from him. Dear lords, were heats meant to hit this hard and fast?! Perhaps his efforts of suppressing it only made the cycle come back mightier with a powerful vengeance. He wiped his brow, splashing the sweat against the ground in the form of droplets. His throat and silver tongue now felt barren and without moisture. And what he lacked in his mouth he made up for between his legs. A whimper came as this uncomfortable fluid once more dripped down the length of his legs. This time, he cared not that it spilled on the floor and marked his heat in that very spot.

"SkekSil!" The excited tone of the general made SkekSil hiss. Not now! And especially not HIM! 

"General," SkekSil began, biting back a moan as he kept himself faced away from the other. "I can not speak right now." He lied. Which usually he was rather good at. But now, at this moment, that lie was utter bullshit. 

"I've just come to discuss how our current relations have changed for what I see as the better," The general spoke, stepping closer to the other skeksis. SkekSil wanted to hiss but found his mouth unable to make the sound. Instead, he whimpers like usual yet with more desperation. The chamberlain clawed closer to his door, holding his stomach area as if it hurt and cringing when another wave of slick dripped down him. "I look forward to growing this partnership. And that, due to you saving my life twice, I am loyal to you." 

"Mmmm yes nice," SkekSil said, really wanting to get away and shut himself off. "Perhaps we speak later, yes? Chamberlain does not feel good." 

"We may not have much time to talk in able bodies. At least me," SkekVar pressed on as he got closer again. "Who knows what punishment falls me for having failed-" 

"Chamberlain will persuade the others to leave you be just as you should leave me be," SkekSil finally managed a hiss. But SkekVar, whether through blissful ignorance or purposeful act of ignoring, once more closed the gap between the two. SkekSil stiffened as SkekVar glanced at the spaces SkekSil had just left and eyed the small droplets. He then lifted his snout and inhaled the air, his nose filling with the sensation of those pheromones. Pheromones that his presence played a part in. 

SkekSil's body, whether he liked it or not, reacted to the other's existence beside him. He whined again when another trail of slick pooled below his body. 

And to SkekVar, it was as if puzzle pieces finally fit in place; even if said pieces belong to completely different puzzles. 

"I understand now," the Chamberlain sighed in relief in the fact that maybe the General would leave him alone. "You want me to mate with you." 

"NO!" SkekSil yelled out without any hesitation. SkekVar was taken back a little, but his murr curled into a confident smile. 

"You don't have to pretend any longer SkekSil. It makes sense now," SkekVar crept closer and SkekSil felt himself shrink against the wall. "I know heat can make skeksis hostile-" 

"I DON'T NEED YOUR HELP!" The chamberlain snarled, his tone deepening. But this only amused SkekVar more and with the added whine after just made his previous notion. He brought his palm forward and caressed the reluctant cheek of the other. SkekSil whimpered but not in his usual fashion. There was a hint of fear. A hint of uncertainty. However, he snapped out of his helpless mindset and snatched his head away. 

"SkekSil, just admit you find me appealing. That your acts of kindness were gestures hinting at a possible bond," SkekVar pressed on. SkekSil found his strength and pushed the general away, and while it didn't send him flying it did create a bit of distance between them. 

"Leave!" SkekSil threatened. But his snarls and growls did nothing to lessen SkekVar's arousal towards him. "Leave chamberlain be!" 

Chamberlain fumbles with the walls as he hugs his back against it, fumbling for whatever was similar to the knob of his living space. His eyes stayed locked on SkekVar who looked at him with much amusement. Sweat and fluids soaked SkekSil as his body continued to betray him by any means. This is not how things are meant to go. This is not how SkekSil is meant to be seen. He is no prey. Yet here he is, feeling the lowest of this idiotic food chain. When was last he felt like this, hm? 

"Chamberlain-" 

" I order you to leave!" SkekSil barks again as he manages to get a grip of the knob on the door and pushes the door open, just enough for his body to snake inside. He thought he was in the clear for a moment. A small, slight, and yet peaceful moment. A moment that, in all of his life, he has never felt and will never feel again. As the door slowly creaks to a close, the other stronger, bolder, and hearty skeksis places his hand within the crap and forced the door to go opposite of him. 

"Can we not play nice?" SkekVar teases as the pheromones flood his brain. SkekSil tried to push back on that wall, the only barrier between him and the other. Yet, his strength was nothing compared to the other. He whimpers as once more his body makes his life difficult. "SkekVar is a friend, remember?" 

The door is pushed open, and to avoid injury the Chamberlain stepped back as the door swung open slowly to reveal the looming figure. A twisted and devilish smile sketched into those war written teeth. A deadly glint in eyes that desire blood and corpses. Yet now, beneath that blaze was the smoke of lust. A lust that was targetted towards the skeksis who made the mistake of becoming friendly with the other. 

"Go on," SkekVar teased. "Lay yourself on that bed." 

"Stay away from me you brute!" SkekSil hissed again. But something inside him clicked and he fell to his knees. He needed to use one hand to hold himself up. The musk that he was releasing became even more powerful as if demanding that he mate with the other skeksis present. But no, he wouldn't! He will NOT!

"I haven't even touched you yet," SkekVar snickered. Who knows if he was aware of the crime he was about to commit. Maybe legitimate ignorance and cluelessness. Maybe leveraging the fact the other was in heat as a possible defense for his actions. No one will know or ever know. What is known is that SkekSil makes a final plea. A loud screaming no the hope someone else will hear it. Even if he were to be laughed at or looked down upon for being nearly overpowered by another, he'd take that over the reality that was currently dangling over his beak. 

"Calm down, the more you struggle the harder it'll be," SkekVar cooed with an unsettlingly gentle voice. SkekSil made another scream, but the General had slammed the door shut behind them.

The walls were soundproof. Outside in the hallway, a cooling breeze travels through the empty way. Silence; utter and horrible silence. Perhaps it is meant to be. Certain atrocities happen with the faintest of whispers. A skeksis walks by, doesn't matter who, and they pause to notice the small droplets that have stayed. But they move on afterward, finding no need to investigate what laid behind that closed door. 

The slow, agonizing hours that ticked. The absence of a knock or a call. There had been no feast that evening. There had been no meeting. All were sent to rest. All meant to be with themselves and tend to themselves. That door stayed sealed for the entire evening. There might have been a cry for help. A brawl. A shattered glass. Maybe two. But those were not heard so it can not be proven. One can only imagine the horror and dread within that closed chamber. Only one thing is certain- 

This will have everlasting effects. 


	2. Chapter 2

He laid there, motionless and ruined. The decorative robe he prided himself in wearing was thrown on the floor at the other end of the chamber. His body was sore. His vocal cords no longer in decent condition from his screams and whimpers of protest. A small glass mirror laid shattered on the floor in front of the bed. Those once fluffy sheets and the firm bed was now littered with deep claw wounds. He felt so cold yet so hot at the same time. The small window let only a fraction of the coming dawn enter the room. 

SkekSil felt the bed shifted as SkekVar sat up and stretched himself. The other sat on the edge of his side for a moment before turning a bit and placing his hand on the exposed shoulder. SkekSil wanted to yank his body away but he feared doing such a thing would reawaken the beast that had unleashed itself upon him that night. The bed creaks, dips, and then resumes its normal form as the footsteps of SkekVar traveled through the room. He snorted and picked up some of the scattered pillows and clothes. Picked up the shards of glass and put them in a neat pile to be deposed of later. All the while, SkekSil laid there on his curled side and tried to convince himself to sleep. He had failed to do so after the assault was over. He feared that if he went unconscious SkekVar would see it as easier fun than fighting with a reluctant body. 

Now, the General seemed satisfied with his work and took it upon himself to clean the mess that had been made. He was glad he could lend himself to help end SkekSil's heat. Sure, at first SkekSil fought like a feral beast, but after a bit, he gave in to the pleasure and reduced himself to sweet moans. 

SkekVar began to put on his attire, a bit of anxiety in him. He knew that the others had used their evening to plan a way to punish the General for the crime of losing to a Gelfling. He looked back at SkekSil and then smiled at the sleeping form. There was hope. Usually, one fellow skeksis vouching for another was enough for the rest to not harm the would-be victim. And after their lovemaking, SkekVar was confident SkekSil would defiantly want to keep him in top shape. 

The Chamberlain stays still, hoping the General would eventually leave. And luckily, the General does finally leave. He doesn't know if he heard anything leave the General's mouth before he exited but honestly, he does care. He sits up in bed, hands resting on his knees as he looks down at his clothes. The longer he sits the longer he starts to hate how venerable he feels. He quickly starts to put something on. Anything and then he sits there, breathing softly.

He hates how it smells now. He hates how the General's musk lingers. He hates the looming aroma of his recent heat. He hates how dry his throat feels yet how sticky and moist everything else is. 

He closes his legs. He hopes he did not end up with spawn. SkekVar had never pulled out. Every time he released he pushed himself deeper inside to make sure the swimmers could pool within the depths of SkekSil's womb. The thought made SkekSil want to throw up. It made him want to scream at his former self for the mistakes he has made leading up to this moment. 

He lays in bed for all of that morning, expecting that no skeksis should be requesting for him anytime soon. He just lays there in the crime scene, trying his hardest to not cry and make it obvious he was upset. He did not know he was to put on an act come this evening. 

* * *

The skeksis gather in the main chamber, surrounding their emperor as they discussed the nature of this war and the odds of losing or winning. Though the scientist had come up with a breakthrough, there was still lingering doubt. Sure, they had massacred a decent amount by their own hands, but this time they're talking about a whole people. Not a group or a single clan but an entire civilization raising their swords against them. 

Names are thrown out. Ideas spilled before being shut down. And the emperor nods with contemplation. 

All the while, SkekSil stood silent. He shifted from side to side but in a very unnoticeable way. The General, who should've been punished, stood right there. His eyes would every so often look at the Chamberlain before back to the group and giving out his own words. Otherwise, like the Chamberlain, he is silent. Yet no one notices or cares to notice.

"Chamberlain," The emperor's voice booms and SkekSil, who hadn't realized his head was done, looked up in surprise. "You have yet to offer a possible solution." 

"Ah," SkekSil begins, trying to ignore the hard stare SkekVar was giving him. "Chamberlain is no good in war. Lies and manipulation will not work." SkekSil surprised the others with his flat out admission of defeat and uselessness. A whimper came as it should, and the emperor scans him up and down before asking another. SkekSil shivers when he feels SkekVar's finger lightly rub against his hanging hand. He wants to run. Hide. Something! It's too late to try and kill the General as he had missed his chance. And to go back on his plea of mercy towards SkekVar would not come to pass. He was trapped and all he could do was pretend there was nothing. 

"SkekUng would be helpful in all of this. He is brutal and intelligent." SkekZok says, which sparks something in SkekSil. The name of that skeksis made SkekSil recall his youth. He was in love once. He had someone he wanted to believe he could share a life with. He wanted SkekUng in every sense of the word; sexually, romantically, physically, and emotionally. He began power hungry too, and for a while wanted to climb the ranks with SkekUng at his side. But they split. Broke apart and SkekUng came to dislike SkekSil. 

The chamberlain blames himself though. There were things that SkekUng wanted that SkekSil selfishly declined. Now, the Chamberlain had wished he had agreed to those requests. Maybe then he wouldn't be under the shadow of the storm that was SkekVar. Had he not been so ambitious then perhaps he could've truly been happy. 

For a moment he pretends that SkekUng will be his savior. That SkekUng will destroy SkekVar and hold SkekSil close to him afterward. It was a silly and immature thought but SkekSil needed thoughts like those. He needed some light in this void of darkness he found himself in. 

The meeting goes on for hours, the scientist making himself present at one point to inform the others about improvements he's making on the Garthim. And for hours SkekSil moved further away from the general, only to have the latter find his way back near his victim. SkekSil did not know what compelled SkekVar to stay so close. He had gotten what he wanted. He was not punished by the others. What made him want to stay? 

The meeting ends and SkekSil is ordered to stay behind with the emperor. SkekVar appeared to want to protest but knew better than to push his luck. So, he left his potential mate alone with their leader. The chamberlain was a bit nervous as nothing he had said would cause the emperor to need a word with him. Or perhaps the lack of anything is why he is about to be scolded. Whatever the case, the chamberlain prepared himself for a possible assertive conversation or punishment. 

"You stay silent for once," The emperor began. "How come?" 

"Chamberlain sorry," He whimpered. "Not feeling too good. Like said, not good with war either." 

Granted, SkekSil was an excellent liar. The best of the best. And while others knew that, he usually had no problem making them believe what he had to say. But this time, he failed at that. This time his lies were crystal clear. To the emperor, there was something very off and very wrong going on. To say that he cared would be a foolish answer, but one worth considering. 

"Usually," The emperor says as he stands and gets close to SkekSil. "I can find it rather difficult to tell whether or not you're fabricating something. But today, I can see it."

"Chamberlain tells truth, yes." SkekSil responded quickly. SkekSo eyed the other before opening his mouth again. 

"As a leader, I've grown to understand my people. I can dissect every slight change. From posture to tone to the way one decides to position themselves," SkekSo takes his hand and lifts SkekSil's face just a bit. Of course, this action made SkekSil shiver a bit and whimper. "Your eyes, Chamberlain, your eyes let me know." 

The Chamberlain didn't know what to say or to do. He could try and lie through his teeth again, but he now understood that SkekSo was much more observant than he used to believe. So, he just let his head fall. There was no point in pretending something wasn't wrong, otherwise SkekSo would have it tortured out of him. However, the Chamberlain had no desire in sharing the exact truth. There was still this lingering idea that somehow he would be blamed and SkekVar wouldn't be held accountable for it. 

"Chamberlain is scared," He finally admits, looking up with foggy eyes. Skeksis rarely appeared this venerable. Rarely do they show off emotions of sadness and helplessness. And for Chamberlain, the main skeksis who would go as far as to taint those who showed these signs in the past was even more shocking. It took a lot to render a skeksis to this. The last time was trines ago when the traitorous SkekGra had that nail driven through his skull. Otherwise, skeksis never outwardly expressed this, especially around their emperor. 

Yet, SkekSo found himself feeling sympathy. He had to admit, he had a slight soft spot for a special few skeksis, and Chamberlain was one of them. Not too soft to where he wouldn't harm him if he deserved it, but soft enough that there is a decent amount of attention given to him and his words. Now, SkekSo found himself wondering what to do next. He was sure many other skeksis was scared too but too worried about being judged to admit it. SkekSil must to so horrified that he disregarded the possible ridicule he would receive and spoke up. 

"I see," SkekSo responds, placing his hand on the other's shoulder. "We are all scared." 

The chamberlain wasn't scared of war, no, he feared the skeksis that thrived on it. He feared that the general would once again raise the ranks and bathe himself in blood. He'll be rewarded and respected and soon he could get or do whatever he wanted. And if he wanted SkekSil, then what could the latter do? He feared that by the time he does say anything about the trauma it will be too late. Oh, forbid SkekVar attempt to fully claim him. The idea made SkekSil want to cry right then and there. But he doesn't. 

"If this fear is making you feel ill, do take it up with the scientist. Being scared is one thing, but being ill is another," For a second, there seemed to be legitimate care in the tone SkekSo was giving him. Whether it was real or not we will never know. The Chamberlain bows his head. 

"Yes my emperor. Chamberlain will leave you now," He responds. SkekSo nods and lets him go on his way, all the while contemplating a minor detail. SkekSil shivered when he touched him. Why? 

* * *

"Please general," SkekSil whimpers when the General has him cornered. 

"Ah," SkekVar begins, "You're on my mind." He licks his lips. He kinda likes how SkekSil plays. Pretending to not want this was a bit exciting. It reminded SkekVar of his first kills and how his victims were terrified of his form before he'd slaughter them. Maybe SkekMal was right. There was a sensation from this type of tactic. 

"Chamberlain has a place to be," the Chamberlain pleads, just as SkekVar grabs his sides and pulls him closer. They are as close as their clothes would allow. And SkekSil starts to remember last night. He remembers that they were closer than this. That there were no clothes to shield him from the touches of the other. He places his hands on the other's chest and tries to push him away. "Chamberlain has to go!" 

SkekVar didn't care and started to lick and kiss on SkekSil's neck. 

"Hmm, wonder if I can still smell your heat~" The general pushed his leg forward in the space between SkekSil's legs. The latter protested. He pushed back again, this time glaring hard at the general. 

"Ok," The general snorts with a smirk. "I'll let you get to whatever." He moves out the way, letting the smaller of the two get by. Of course, SkekVar just has to watch SkekSil walk away with lewd thoughts fogging his mind. 

* * *

He was in a secluded part of the castle, far from anyone or anything. It was there that he broke down into tears. 

He crouched down and let the tears fall and drop on the floor. Salvia leaked from his open and wailing mouth. His cries were painful yet not loud. He pressed his head against the wall and supported his body with his hands as he let the wall witness his mess first hand. 

He's never cried this hard before. So hard that he eventually passes out. But, he could confidently say that it was the most decent sleep he was going to get for a long while. 


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I apologize that this is short.

There is a feast. There always is one. No matter the issues that arise there is always food to be given. The meal isn't as grand as usual, but it still holds that intense vibe of savagery. The skeksis resume their position on in the seating, one being left empty. The skeksis await their meals from the none rebellious podlings. Podlings weren't cowards, they were experts in self-preservation. Otherwise, they too would've turned against the tyrants. 

The food squirmed and pulsed and oozed. Hairy and scales and other nasty things littered the dishes that only the skeksis would dare to enjoy. It was sickening beyond belief.

The murmurs danced within the air as the lords scrambled about their coming war. The General, who had been forgiven and allowed to regain his position, spoke proudly about himself. While he admitted his flaws having lost to a useless gelfling, he added that it would only motivate him more to see their blood spill. And that promise made the crowd roar with thrilling excitement. The war will be swift and easy. With the garthim and the arrival of fellow skeksis, there was no way this could be a loss for them. 

All were cheering and eating like the feral beast they were; except the chamberlain. 

He poked at his food, head low and eyes seeming glossy. His stature at the moment didn't seem to draw much attention as everyone was too busy throwing out ideas and a few jokes here and there. But SkekSil kept his beak shut and just thought. There was no way of knowing what he was thinking but it's safe to guess what that might be. He does eventually put food in his mouth, but it is a very small portion of his overall meal. A tentacle goes flying to the left while an eyeball rolls to the right. He was kinda glad that everything was still chaotic. No one would ask him what's wrong because if they did he would surely begin to cry. 

"Chamberlain," The low voice of the emperor says, shaking SkekSil out of his dazed state. "Eat." 

"I-" SkekSil stops himself and does as his leader says, eating on the food given to him. Well, it would be a waste to not eat. So he does, and he can't tell if the hinted smile of the emperor was in his head or not. As he eats, he gets that unnerving sensation. That feeling of those beady eyes watching him. He looked up. He was right. SkekVar stared him down, a smile crawling on his face. For a moment, SkekSil forgot how to swallow. 

"SkekSil," SkekZok began, a bit of joy in his words. "You have yet to crack a joke." 

"Ah," SkekSil responded, trying to fake his emptiness. "Chamberlain is....not well today. Too stressed, yes." 

This single gesture was enough to shock everyone to silence. And SkekSil regretted that. He wanted to get sucked down and swallowed by Thra. He just did not want to be here right now. 

"You? Stressed?" SkekOk squawked out with genuine surprise.

"Just forget what Chamberlain said and gone on with conversations," He snapped back, the only bit of aggression he has been able to muster thus far. But, they do not resume. Now they are curious. And curious skeksis isn't always the best type of skeksis. 

"It can't be ignored. It must be so bad that you haven't even eaten!" The gourmand replied, also filled with this odd interest and concern. SkekSil hated this. He hated how all the eyes were suddenly beaming at him. 

"Nothing important," SkekSil says. "Personal, yes." 

He feels like he wants to throw up when SkekVar pulls out a smirk. 

But they keep pushing. They continued to keep pushing him. Enough to where he wanted to just run and cry.

"ENOUGH!" The emperor roars, shutting up every pestering beak at that table. SkekSil hadn't realized how hard he was gripping the table until he started to try and jerk his claws from within it. The emperor scanned him up and down before addressing the others. "You heard him. Stop your idiotic pestering. It is annoying! I grow a headache from it!" 

The chamberlain looked at the emperor, a slight bit of hope that the leader cared. And while that idea was far fetched, he still liked to imagine that it was true. That at least one of them gave a damn about him. 

"Yes," SkekVar booms, making SkekSil's heartbeat harshly. "Your questions are useless and contribute nothing!" The general's harsh tone left no further room for arguments and the feast resumed as if the questions never happened. SkekSo, the attentive leader, noticed the atmosphere around the two skeksis he was rather fond of. He noted how every other second SkekVar's eyes would linger on the chamberlain, and how the latter seemed uncomfortable with that. 

He would be sure to address that. 

"Reason you wanted to walk with me, sir?" The general asked, really not wanting to be here. He wanted to find SkekSil and persuade him into a second round. However, once the feast had concluded and the skeksis were dismissed. the emperor made sure to pull the general aside. 

"You seem...invested..in the chamberlain. I could not fail to notice the change that has sprung about you two," The emperor spoke in a calm tone as the two ventured down the twisting halls. His hands stayed behind his back as they walked, waiting for a reply from the general. SkekSo had already pieced together that something had transpired between them. Sure, the chamberlain had saved the general once and had assisted him upon being injured, but even great gratitude would not be on this scale. He honestly would not be so curious if it wasn't for the fact that this was very imbalanced. While the general appeared to radiate positivity, the chamberlain was otherwise. 

"Ah," SkekVar finally replies. "I hold great esteem for him." 

"Is that so?" 

"It is so, sir," SkekVar responds, trying to make sure his emotions did not rise in his voice. He wondered why the emperor would approach him on such a matter. Were they in trouble? Had another skeksis told of their intercourse? Perhaps maybe SkekSo was going to remind him of a forgotten but powerful rule from their beginnings. 

"I have loyalty to him, sir. He has saved my life twice and has yet to ask for a favor in return. It sounds crazy, that I am aware, but after returning to the castle I felt a connection," SkekVar pauses, recalling the evening he helped SkekSil with his heat. He sighs. "He had spared me from the wrath of punishment-" 

"I would've had you spared regardless," The emperor interrupts, a frown on his beak. It wasn't jealousy, no, but more so complicated frustration. He knew there was something hidden in those words. He hated that. He hated that there was something growing and he wasn't aware of it. 

"Sir," SkekVar stops, looking down at the ground for a moment. SkekSo stopped too, eyeing the other skeksis. "I feel something, something for him that I used to for another. This time, however, those feelings appear to be returned. I'm...excited. Happy." He stops himself, looking up at the testing eyes of his ruler. He didn't say it. He didn't need to say it. The hint was clear and the other got it. SkekSo sighed, looking away and waving his hand for SkekVar to follow. 

"SkekSil....he is not well," The emperor told him, voice returning to monotone. SkekVar perked up, a concerned look growing. "He may be sick. I do not know what though. This illness has rendered him almost unrecognizable." The conversation drags on, both skeksis admitting to the ounce of care they held towards the chamberlain. An onlooker could assume that this was a good thing, but an individual with a careful eye could perhaps see where the horror starts. Two beings, powerful in both rank and strength, now dangle this newfound interest with the unlucky skeksis. The outcome is yet to be predicted. 

SkekSil leans against one of the many balconies, staring out into the vast sky. His mind wanders, going on about the past, present, and future. He thinks thoughts he had never considered, and nightmares he hopes are just that; nightmares. He feels his gut turn and he has the urge to vomit yet he holds that in. Like many things, he is currently holding in. 

He considers going to the scientist to get himself checked out, but that only makes him squirm. Thra forbids anything had come of that dreadful encounter with the general. 

He leans forward more, eyes staring with a sense of longing and the deep water below. His claws digging into the building structure as he gets on his toes. He considers it. He considers throwing himself off the edge. Whether death or the ability to escape, either or become a more desirable ideal than what he was faced with now. He leans further, his torso now pressed against the barrier as the water calls to him. 

The breeze dances around him, and for a moment it is as though it is trying to pull him back within the confines of the castle. 

Further still. His feet are now on the tips of his toes. The water looked friendly with each second. 

Then he stops. He blinks and then slowly lowers himself back to the ground. He sinks on the floor, hands pressed against his face as he once again weeps aloud. He never had thoughts like this. Never before had he ever been thrilled with the thought of death. 

He sits there and cries, no longer caring if anyone was to come upon his broken state. Unknown to him, a skeksis does find him, and they are more than willing to help a friend. 


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I apologize for being so late AND this being so short. It was honestly a bit hard to get back into the right rhythm after being away for a while. I hope you guys enjoy this regardless.

SkekAyuk kneeled beside the chamberlain, offering his hand out as SkekSil looked up with puffy eyes. With this skeksis, he was willing to show his emotions. Wiping his tears and sniffling, he took the outreached hand and stood up slowly. For a few moments, there were no words shared between the two as SkekSil straightened himself out and taking small breaths. SkekAyuk waited patiently for the other to begin speaking first, reserving judgment till after finding out what bothered the other. He had no true problems with Sil, so he held little desire to beat the other down if unprompted. 

"Thank you," Chamberlain began, too ashamed to look the other in the eyes. The gourmand sighed and placed his palm on SkekSil's shoulder, turning him slightly. 

"Something is bothering you. I noticed at the feast when you didn't eat. And then I find you here crying," The gluttonous individual had actual concern in his words. The coming war has made him slightly softer and open. The prospect of actually having fellow skeksis ripped from existence dawned on him, and he realized that perhaps these moments show have some kindness as they never know if it's their last. "What's wrong?" 

"Chamberlain-" SkekSil pauses, not knowing whether or not he should share what happened. It's only been a day or two but it feels like he's been holding this inside him for much longer. "As I said, I'm just stressed and sad." 

"That's not it," SkekAyuk instantly responds. "There are perks to being the cook. I watch everyone ever so carefully to get a better understanding of not only the food but the skeksis themselves. You can learn a lot by how one eats...or doesn't." SkekSil raised a brow. 

"What is gourmand hinting?" There was a bit of worry in SkekSil's question. He worried that somehow THIS skeksis would be the one to crack his shell, and as the moments ticked it appeared that it was going to be the case. Gourmand said nothing and just gave a long look before shaking his head and crossing his arms. 

"I've seen you eat in various emotional states. From angry to happy to sad to stressed. Each time you've eaten different but eaten nonetheless. This is more than what you're letting out, this is something that is burning your throat so much that you can barely swallow." He concludes and is shocked when SkekSil begins to laugh. But it is a painful laugh as tears start to come again at the corner of those broken eyes. 

"When did gourmand become philosopher, hm?" And while it was meant to come off as joking and reinsurance to gourmand that SkekSil is indeed telling the truth, it all but let the other know that HE had just revealed what SkekSil was hiding for the past two days. He comes forward and pulls a stunned SkekSil into a hug. The contact makes SkekSil freak out and push SkekAyuk back with a powerful force, the loud shout of "NO" echoes and SkekSil flashes his claws. SkekAyuk stands there, looking in awe at how beastly and defensive the chamberlain became from the contact. And it was that final move that made SkekAyuk figure out the main piece of the puzzle; someone harmed SkekSil. 

* * *

They sat there on SkekSil's bed, the only sound was the chamberlain's crying as SkekAyuk sat there with his eyes widened in horror. While yes, the skeksis wasn't considered a kind people, as they often inflict physical harm onto each other out of punishment or to make examples of, but the sexual assault was NEVER something to be done. Never HAS been done. Sure, tearing off limbs, inflicting head trauma, and having eyes eaten are horrible things, but to fully violate and destroy the sanctity of another body, who didn't deserve punishment at the time any less, is an act that made SkekAyuk want to vomit. 

"I..." The gourmand was speechless, trying to figure out how he had missed obvious signs drawn in front. Or maybe they weren't obvious enough. So subtle that only a skilled eye could spot them. Regardless, the gourmand felt disgusted unlike he's ever had in hundreds of trine. "I'm...sorry." He could only muster up those words as SkekSil continued to weep. 

"Don't tell," SkekSil brought up his head a bit. His friend turned with a confused look. 

"Why?! Shouldn't the others be alerted!?" 

"And what then? Will they believe me?" The question made SkekAyuk close his mouth and sit back in the realization that justice can not be served. SkekSil's record of turning and lying has put him in the position of being a voiceless victim. And the more he thought the more he realized that for the time being chamberlain has to be silent. Everyone is stressed out about the coming war so even if they did believe SkekSil they'd be too busy figuring out battle tactics and who is in charge of what, that SkekVar will get a slap on the wrist. And worse yet, he may assault SkekSil again, angered that his "lover" had turned on him and tried to throw him to the flames. 

"It's...it's pointless," SkekSil tells him. But then he smiles. It's a sad smile and SkekAyuk knows it. "At least someone knows. That lifts a minor weight off chamberlain's shoulders." A single final tear rolls down SkekSil's cheek. 

* * *

It still took a while for the reinforcements to arrive, and the first of them was the mighty SkekUng. His presence alone sent chills down the spines of the others. Only he and a few others could have that effect on skeksis. And none felt that effect more than SkekSil. By now, the thing that had infected him began to grow, and he all but realized that he had indeed fallen pregnant for the skeksis that assaulted him. He cried to Ayuk about it, the only skeksis who would comfort him. And at the same time, Var became more and more affectionate. He grew touchy and cornered SkekSil multiple times a day just to gaze at his body and kiss on his neck. And SkekSil was helpless to do anything about it. That was until a certain someone returned. 

SkekUng seemingly towered over the others, whether metaphorically or literally. He snarled as he walked past everyone, including SkekVar who also snarled under his breath. Yet, Chamberlain felt his heart flutter. Were those old feelings?

When SkekUng's determined and burning eyes landed on SkekSil, the chamberlain knew that things were about to go from bad to worse; and SkekVar felt that too. 


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> After seven months I finally updated! Sorry for the long wait. It took me a while to get back into the Dark Crystal fandom while also familiarizing myself with my fic again. Hope you guys enjoy it!

SkekSil listened carefully as SkekUng rambled on about his adventures outside the castle. He mentioned lands farther than the mind could imagine if kept locked in a castle. He talked about the blood he spilled and the lands he conquered. The entire table, minus a jealous skeksis, was enthralled with his stories. Were all his stories completely true? Probably not, but even if they were the others did not care. This skeksis brought hope. He brought an extra drive to fight against the rising gelfling. A fresh set of hands and eyes on a battlefield they had grown numb to.

The table was arranged differently this time as SkekUng was momentarily put in place beside General, who didn't like that one bit. Throughout the ordeal, SkekVar had this unnerving feeling as he would glance over and see SkekSil look upon the other with eyes that SkekVar had yet to see. His heart tightened at the idea of SkekUng wooing over his former lover. Yes, SkekVar was more than aware of the history between the two. Few knew it, but he did. He remembers many nights he'd catch them giggling with hand in hand down the corridors, smiles blooming on their faces. Thinking of it now made him want to vomit. What if SkekUng hadn't truly lost those feelings and decided he wanted SkekSil back. That alone made SkekVar growl and angrily bite into his meal.

"Ung has a plan, yes? A good one?" The Chamberlain said, his voice being the most upbeat it had been in days. Though it wasn't too shocking. Having spoken with the gourmand, SkekSil decided to begin acting as if nothing was wrong. His idea was that the longer he pretended he was fine, eventually, he'll be fine.

"Plenty," SkekUng said proudly. "If the scientist hurries up with those monsters, I can start my grand ideas!" He gives a booming chuckle and SkekSil returns it with a giggle of sorts. No one pays attention to it, aside from SkekVar. The general angrily bit down on his squirming meal, unintentionally splashing some of its fluids on to the skeksis beside him. SkekUng growled but did not resort to anything other than mumble something below his breath.

"Received any word from SkekSa?" The emperor asked. Ung shook his head.

"I apologize but I have not. Though I did send a message. Perhaps she will return when we most need her. Like destiny, if you will." He snickers at his joke. And a few others join in. For a moment there was relief at the table. The looming tension of war had been momentarily lifted from above them. Though a new tension bubbled. SkekVar grew more and more jealous as the evening dragged on. He noticed how the atmosphere around the former lovers was...tender. He didn't like the spark coming from each other's eyes.

But alas he could not act. Now was not the time after all. Perhaps later in the evening he would visit SkekSil and remind him of the love they shared. He considers that the reason the chamberlain had grown distant. While he had done his best to be affectionate, he had yet to try and bed the chamberlain again. His logic wasn't sound but it was logic nonetheless. As the dinner died down and skeksis began to dismiss themselves, SkekVar was about to make his way to the chamberlain when SkekSo stopped him.

"We must speak," SkekSo said in a stern voice as SkekVar stared longingly and the retreating chamberlain, whom he noticed was being closely followed by the returned Skeksis. A small growl left him lips just as the emperor snapped his fingers. "We must talk about your behavior."

* * *

"SkekUng has something he wants to say, hm?" SkekSil teased as he walked down the corridor as SkekUng stalked behind him. The bigger of the two smirked, his sharp fangs made known. His pace quickened and within a few short bounds, he was beside the smaller.

"Yes," Ung began with a purr in his voice," You look...appealing."

"Ah," SkekSil giggles. "Ung gives flattery I see. Thank you."

"I love your energy," Ung continues, reaching out and grabbing Sil's arm gently. "You have a...interesting aurora surrounding you."

"Heh," The chamberlain chuckles again. "Time from the castle has made you a smooth talker, yes?"

Ung joined him in that chuckle. The new garthim master was relieved to see that he would not have to act hostile towards his former lover. The trines spent away made him rethink the relationship they had and was willing to admit his flaws internally. Had SkekSil not changed then he wouldn't have found the strength to try and reform what little positive relationship they had. Luckily, that wasn't an issue now.

"Chamberlain thought of you always," SkekSil admitted as he leaned his head on Ung's shoulder. "Sometimes thinking of cuddling in your quarters. Other times I think of strangling you in your sleep. Both good, hehe."

Ung chuckled at SkekSil's brutal honesty. And he knew he was honest. That's what made Ung feel special as Sil would lie to many, but in the end, he would always tell the truth to his lover, no matter the context and how it would affect the other's emotions. He found that to be what drew him to SkekSil. Well, that and his looks. Sure, they've all aged and lost some of their beauty from their youth, but to Ung, SkekSil aged just right.

"Say," Ung tilts his head towards his chamber as they pass by it. "Maybe we should have a more private reunion. Let our entire being get used to each other again~" The sexual tone in Ung's voice traveled through Sil's body. He gasped when Ung pulled him close and nuzzled under his chin.

"Oh," Sil purred, "That is a good offer but-" Suddenly, out the corner of his eye, SkekSil caught SkekVar spying from the side of one of the corners. His eyes flaring with anger and jealousy. SkekSil gulped and politely pushed Ung away.

"Perhaps another time," Sil responded. Ung was disappointed but understood. "Um, have a good evening." He says quickly before darting away in the other direction. Ung stood there confused until he looked to his right and saw a shadow quickly move. A frown curled on his lips.

Some other skeksis had frightened the chamberlain out of their oh so pleasant conversation. That thought angered the war skeksis. All these trines away from another who had taken over his heart and genitals, only to have another yank that opportunity away. Ung knew if he caught a glimpse of the individual who had sparked such a reaction that he’d be more than willing to create conflict. 

Meanwhile, SkekSil paced quickly to his chambers, ready to lock the door behind him and curl underneath the covers as if such weak articles would protect him. Alas, it was the thought of safety that drew him to that imaginary solution. To the illusion of calm and quiet. However, that illusion would soon be shattered. 

As the skeksis turned the corner to make his way to his chamber, he was greeted by crossed arms and an angry snarl. The general, the skeksis who had assaulted him days prior, stood guard at his victim’s room. The very room he had done the crime. The chamberlain gulped, knowing he couldn’t just turn away and walk away as if he had seen nothing. No. Their eyes locked. Two souls bonded; hatred and fear mixed with lust and confusion. 

Skeksil did not want to appear weak. He did not want to whimper as if he was entering heat again. However, he knew trying to be bigger than he was was a fruitless effort. The general overpowered him by any means and therefore it was a losing battle. 

“SkekSil,” SkekVar spoke with his usual gruff tone. “What had you giggling along with the Garthim Master?” 

“None of Var’s business,” SkekSil snapped, allowing himself a moment of feistiness before it was to be snuffed by the bigger skeksis. “Conversation among old friends.”

“Old lovers too,” Var adds on, the words leaving his mouth like venom. SkekSil shivered slightly, noting the dangerous aurora coming off the larger skeksis. The general stepped forward, reaching his hand out to tenderly touch the chamberlain’s cheek. Of course, his victim winced yet did not move away. From his simple touch, he had caused the whimpering skeksis to turn to stone, frozen with fear and concern. SkekSil had no idea what Var had in mind or what the touch meant. Comfort? Or a reminder that Var owned his being? 

“Must you say it like that?” SkekSil manages to say, mustering up only a small amount of courage. Var snickered and gave a sickly grin.

“I’m only stating the obvious, chamberlain,” The general replied, his hand not yet leaving the other’s cheek. The warrior felt as though if he removed his hand the chamberlain would go running back to Ung, throwing himself into the arms of an old flame because it was familiar and ancient. Var wanted Sil to see him as he saw the chamberlain. A lover. A lone skeksis that he could come to when in need of affection and comfort. In fact, SkekSil should feel honored. Barely do any of the others hold concern for the chamberlain aside from Var and their emperor.

“I feel tired, yes,” SkekSil quickly lied, wanting to get away from the skeksis that violated and planted his seed within him. His body and mind were tired of fighting, however. Tired of this chase that never seemed to end. At most, it had only been a couple of days since the assault. But for the chamberlain, it felt like he’s had to carry the weight of this for many trines. 

“Let me accompany you this time,” Var comments, finally removing his hand to throw both up in a gesture only described as persuasion. “This evening feels cold. We should keep each other warm.”

“Chamberlain prefers to be alone, yes,” SkekSil quickly replies. But the reply only caused the general’s expression to twist into a deepened frown. His eyes began to emit a dangerous and angry glow. 

“Hm, I assume had Ung offered such a position you’d gleefully-” 

“Are you envious of him, hm?” SkekSil dared to bark back. This comment. This statement was enough to make Var’s friendly approach melt completely. In a quick motion, the general’s hand snatched the chamberlain’s wrist, squeezing it under his intense power. Skeksil managed to pain-filled whimper, latching his free hand on top of the other in an attempt to move it away. Alas, it did very little. 

“I am not envious of that skeksis. I caution him because he is trying to take what is mine!” Var snarled, no longer holding back his brutality whilst being aware of it. Skeksil guilted, remembering this raw force on the night of his assault. Var’s grip tightened with every second that passed, making Skeksil weak in his knees. 

“I...I…” I am not yours. That’s what chamberlain wants to say. But he swallows those words. He knows better to anger an already irritated beast. His eyes shift around the corridor, hoping that some others would come and see this. That they would question why the general had skeksil in such a hold. Even if Var were to lie and the other skeksis believe him, the mere fact of the matter is that they would still stop it. 

“Now, I say this again as an order. No longer a request. As my mate I expect that we share quarters. Whether you come to mine or I go to yours. I want Ung to stay away from you unless directed by the emperor.” Var’s voice did not sound like the fake warmth and caring skeksis from before who appeared to not know that what he was doing was wrong. This was the war driven skeksis talking now. A skeksis who got what he wanted when he wanted. And Skeksil felt his heart drop. Tears threatened to come from his eyes but he refused to let Var see. 

“Fine…” The chamberlain mutters under his breath. “If that is what the general wants-”

“Don’t call me that,” Var speaks. “We are mates. You call me by my name, Skeksil.” 

“Yes,” SkekSil speaks softly, glancing quickly at his hand, which he felt growing numb. “SkekVar.” 

That evening, he lays in his bed, head resting against the chest of his...mate. They didn’t have intercourse, thankfully, but SkekSil still felt as icky as he did that night. He wanted to say he didn’t deserve this fate, but perhaps this was some type of pay back from all the souls who have perished thanks to him. 

His hand drifts down towards his stomach, hoping that whatever manifests inside him dies. Hoping that Thra, somehow, ended the creature’s miserable existence before it was even born. What cruel fate it is to be here now. He thinks that there is another version of him who had agreed with his first instinct and slaughtered the general. But for once SkekSil had been too greedy. Too blinded by the thoughts of a far future and ignored the one that was heading towards him in that moment. 

As he closes his eyes, he wishes he were with Ung. He wishes the warmth he felt was from his old love and that the creature growing within him belonged to his old love. Not this skeksis. Not a general who blinded placed faith in their emperor and threw himself upon the livelihood of the chamberlain. 

Unknown to him, the war written skeksis who he is wishing for has done his investigation. As anger filled him, SkekUng was ready for war; both in and out of the castle.


End file.
